Currently, I'm having a feast. Yes, I said feast - because that's what it feels like to be able to eat until I'm full. This is a revelation for me. I haven't eaten until full in three years. I mean, let's be honest, calorie counting doesn't really help you get in touch with your body. It helps you get in touch with how many calories are in what foods and what a portion of that food looks like. At this point I could size-out a cup, an ounce, 12 oz of liquid, 2 tbsp, etc in my sleep. And, once you've met your calories for the day well....that's it and too bad if you're still hungry. But today, I'm feasting. I have a spread of carrots, celery, broccoli, cauliflower, baked salmon, cantaloupe, honeydew, pineapple, pecan-crackers, an ounce of pepper jack cheese, and a whole mango. Obviously, I won't eat it all. I'll be full in about 10 more bites but it's so nice to just be able to eat.
My god daughter, Squish, turned 4 on Monday and today was her party at a bounce house. The party was absolutely darling! I went with Kells Bells and her daughter (and my other and oldest god daughter) Bug. Those kids had me running through this bounce-house obstacle course like a maniac! Having eaten only a piece of meatloaf for breakfast I was very hungry by the time we got to the part of the party that involved presents and.......cake. There it sat - a two layer white cake with strawberry butter cream layers and vanilla butter cream frosting and decorated beautifully with a fruit rainbow. I haven't had anything processed in 6 days now and I couldn't get myself over to where the fruit and veggies I had brought were sitting.
I helped pass out the cake - looking at every piece that I handed out and noticed who got bits of strawberry, mango, blueberry.....Did the fruit make the butter cream even more delectable? As I finished handing out the pieces Squish's mom, and my dear friend - J, turns to me and says "You'll have a bite won't you?" A good friend of hers made the cake and J decorated it herself and it would be so very easy for me to justify having one small bite. And then I hear myself say "I sure won't." And that's when I realized....I didn't actually want the cake. I wanted the fruit. And this realization takes me totally by surprise. The fruit? Really? I want the fruit?
Well, apparently so because I bee-line over to the fruit tray and pop a cold sweet piece of honeydew melon in my mouth and then another and some pineapple and a few carrots and suddenly I'm more than content. Yeah, my body wanted whole fruits and veggies when it was presented with what turned out to be (according to every guest) an amazing cake. The pieces of honeydew, pineapple, and carrots were enough to get me home to where I had food - hence the feast.
I'm not saying this is easy because it's not. But what is hard about it, right now, isn't so much having to restrict myself. Rather, the hard part is turning out to be that there are often places where there is literally nothing I can eat. It was sheer luck that J asked me to bring along some fruits and veggies. Last night I went to one of my favorite local cafes, as I sat reading Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins, I attempted to order something from the menu. Unfortunately, there was literally not one thing that I could eat. It all had processed stuff - bread, crust, pasta, or lots of sugar. I ended up ordering a vegetable sandwich with no bread. The guy working was sweet enough to make me a full on hummus plate. But, that won't happen every time I go somewhere - which is the challenge I'm attempting to figure a creative solution to at the moment.
I am planning to try this recipe as soon as I can....just waiting for a day when T is home from work early enough to eat with me because boy does she LOVE scallops!
http://paleodietlifestyle.com/spicy-scallop-salad/
If anyone tries it before I do let me know how it turns out!
No comments:
Post a Comment